Friday, March 20, 2009

WHY YOU? WHY NOT ME?

Recently, this has been an oft-asked question. Sometimes, it is indirectly (actually directly), meant for God. Other times, just one's spirit asking the air around them, while not understanding who might receive it!

There seems to be a sudden lake-full of maladies, ranging from serious surgeries, pneumonia, flu, cancer, heart attacks and other illnesses/injuries. Some boldly ride these waves of change in their lives; others are still in shock and remain numb, floating and just keeping their head above water; others are purposefully striding along and preparing for a huge battle, manning the oars, so to speak!

Recently, my daughter had a real scare. Her mammogram results showed "something suspicious" in both breasts. So, she was scheduled for an ultra-sound at another facility 2 days later. No one expects it to be them that receives the much-dreaded "C word". That's just too much for our brain and emotions to accept as a possibility, yet it happens to hundreds of people every day. She found she could say that the odds were it was nothing serious. She could also voice her love for and trust in the Lord. She also knew realistically, that if she received a negative report, she would still have at least some time left to "prepare" her family. As her mother, I also knew it was probably not cancer. Yet my mind would inevitably picture her coping along with her husband and children, and my mother's heart suffered deeply for her. Recently, I heard this on the radio: "It might be today you place your wounded hands on my tear-stained face." In my prayer for her, I praised God, her Father, for intricately forming her, for knowing the number of hairs on her head, for knowing every nook and cranny of her heart, for understanding every pain and hurt she had suffered and for blessing her with so many beautiful people in her life, but most of all, for loving her in a way I couldn't even imagine! Way beyond my love for her which is huge! Praise the Lord, her tests proved that there was nothing for concern. The good that came out of this was providing a deeper understanding of the vulnerability that crops up in our lives. Another good is the humbling effect that is so profound. Then the questions come...why you? why not me? Very humbling.

These two questions have been asked so many times by so many people for so many years. The answer has been attempted by many in countless ways, yet the exact true answer remains only in the hands of the One who created, loves, issues justice, mercy, grace, healing and compassion as He wills and for His purpose, His glory.

How I pray that for those who do not trust God, for those who have not accepted His gift of salvation. How I pray that in their lifetime, their heart will open to the truth and beauty of Jesus, our Savior. I do see and understand the problem for some to even consider accepting Christ. I've heard it all, from the church is overflowing with hypocrits (not overflowing, but maybe a bit crowded!); to how confused Christians are since they can't explain much of anything; they're still sinners, and on and on.

In my heart, there is no one I know, or have ever heard of, and those I have never met nor heard of, that I would want to be separated from God forever, in a place designated for them. I can't imagine an eternity spent apart from your Creator, the One who loves you best. I have actually wept over the knowledge that many will spend eternity that way. Why would they choose that? I know some who worship sun, moon, stars, mother Earth, Father whomever, etc. That's about as ridiculous as worshipping a cucumber plant! I just want to scream in frustration over how they think that those created things can possibly continue their life after death?! I could laugh hysterically if it wasn't so sad, so final, so blind.

I just can't continue this post right now. I'm just heartsick.

1 comment:

Barb said...

Well-thought-out, well-written, full-of-truth post! I share your heartsickness. “I was swimming in the depths, but Christ had His hand under my chin all the time, and took good heed that I should not lose breath..." ...Juanita.
(This comment and one of those for the French Dip, is not from me, but the only way we can post it for now is through me!)